Skip to main content

Right Above The Crack

That's where all my pain is. I'm not even going to think about apologizing for being graphic there. It's my pain and that's where it's at. I took a tylenol 3 w/codeine and that did nothing for me. I think I've taken too much of it in the past for migraines and back pains. The husband said he would try very hard to get home early today and god bless him for that. Everytime I have to get up, I cry. Donovan has been pretty good today. I think he knows when Mamma is truly hurting and he took it easy on me so far. We'll see about after the nap. Sophia has no qualms about being overly dramatic today. She could care less that I'm crying - so is she so what's so special? We've done a lot of cuddle time today and that's cool with me. Until I have to get up.

My joke for the day from my friend Linna:

It was entertainment night at the senior center and the Amazing
Claude was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the
famed hypnotist do his stuff. As Claude went to the front of the meeting
room, he announced, "Unlike most hypnotists who invite two or three
people up here to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every
member of the audience."
The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful
antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your
eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my
family for six generations.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly
chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch..."
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light
gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes
followed the swaying watch, until, suddenly,----- it slipped from the
hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.

Shit!" said the Hypnotist...

It took three weeks to clean up the senior center.


There's one about an earthquake in Mexico but I'm not sure if I should post it or not. It did make me laugh but still.....

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

This Has To Be Said

I haven't blogged in 8 months. We bought a house, still unpacking, school started. You know, life. I felt the need, the urgent need to blog about the Adrian Peterson situation today. I am full of all sorts of feelings and had to write about it. I would love to hear your thoughts on this whole thing. No really, I would. I don't feel I was a douchebag in my writing so all I ask is you not be a douchebag in your response. Thanks. My thoughts on the Adrian Peterson situation (but first, some backstory): I was spanked as a child. I'm pretty sure most of us that grew up in the 80s were. Until the summer between 5th and 6th grade I lived in Charelston, SC and from 6th to 11th grade, North Chicaco, IL. I have seen every form of discipline doled out on a child. I've seen spankings, beatings, hairbrushes smacked into heads, spoons hitting the tops of heads, whips, belts and even switches. I've seen it all. Most of you know that my son is named after a little boy who
Post a Comment
Read more

This, That and The Other

I can already tell that Thanksgiving and Christmas are going to suck ass even more than it normally would at my job. Last night, a guy was telling me how much he gave me, how much he was supposed to get back and THEN told me what order to give it back to him in. Um? Sir? I'm not a twit, ok, I am a twit, but I'm not an idiot. Ok, sometimes I can be. Like that time I moved up to Wisconsin in the middle of a blizzard from nice, warm Tucson, AZ for a dumb boy and we broke up less than two months later. Yeah that sucked but my point is: I've been in retail, just about every job one could have except store manager, for about oh, 19 years. I think I know what I'm doing when it comes to giving change back. Don't talk to me like I'm a 16 yr old kid who's working his first job and doesn't give a shit what kind of work ethic he has. I care about you as a customer but when you're a dick to me and pissing off everyone in my line so they are dicks to me ? Well,
11 comments
Read more

Get Your Motor Running

Something fabulous happened this week. Glorious even. Spectacular. Heaven Sent. (ok that one may be stretching it a bit). I am no longer a stay at home mom with the potential to go crazy because I can't get out of the house with the kids until the husband comes home from work and that could be 1pm or 6pm, it's a crapshoot. My husband has to drive all over the Twin Cities and the surrounding areas to see his customers for work. We have a gas guzzling Explorer that I love (minus the whole gas guzzling part of course). He's put a couple thousand (maybe three or four) on that thing since starting his job in Nov. I was griping to my therapist about how I feel trapped at home. I'm not me anymore. I don't know what I like anymore if it doesn't involve one of the kids. I hated that this was happening. Wow, I sure do go on tangents. (My ex once told me that he has to run mentally to keep up with me conversationally. So true) Last week, we up and got ourselves this bad b
6 comments
Read more