Skip to main content

Ladies Man

The evil mecca known as Target called out to me again tonight. Actually, it called out to my husband, shockingly, and off we went. The mission was to buy Monkey Boy some new shorts and shirts and maybe some pants. He's only 3 and wears size 5T stuff. He wears stuff that my 7 1/2 yr old nephew outgrew last year. He's a big boy that kid of mine. Shirts and shorts at $4 each? Done. Mickey Mouse jumper with shirt for $6something? Done. Whilst I was purusing the clearance racks (oh how I love those!) I heard the boy say "I need to go say hi Daddy" then they disappeared. I finally found them down by the furniture and the poor child was crying. Tears, crying. "I just want to say hi to them Daddy!" There were 3 girls running around being loud and obnoxious as some 13-15 yr olds can be I suppose. (I don't recall ever running around a store screaming like they were and I know it's not my selective memory. That's about other stuff that we won't go into cause my dad could find this blog someday) ANYway. I called out to the girls to please stop for the love of all things holy so that my little boy could say hi to them. Thank god I'm not diabetic, all that sugar from them woulda killed me. "Awwww!" "Oh look, he's so cute!" "Oh hi little man! How are you?" Then my son, being the good boy that he is, chucks a toy football at them and demands that they play hutball with them. On the one hand, I wasn't pleased that he wanted to talk to them because they were being naughty (which we talked about a few minutes later when Target security booted them). Yet on the other hand, he was being so polite and saying please and thank you (nevermind the chucking of the ball at the one's face, a shame he missed but I digress). While we finished shopping, he said hi to every girl he saw that was 5ft and under. I'm glad he likes the ladies but the terrifying visions of middle school and oh. my. god. high school?

drinking self into stupor

Comments

Les Becker said…
Oh, Trish - wait'll Peanut grows up, and then you'll be the mother of one of those screaming girls! They're probably quite sane - alone - but put 'em together and they go stupid. I know this; mine flips back and forth between sweet child/shrieking dervish about twenty times (this is on the WAY to the mall!) depending upon how many of her friends we run into during our walk.
8:12 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

DOODLEBOPS UNMASKED - ALL THREE

Please do not ask me to email photos out, I get entirely too many requests for them. These are the ones that I have at home, thanks to a couple of sources.
Read more

Customer Appreciation Day

Dear Crotchety Broad, While I love my job and think it's the easiest one in the world to have, I do not think dealing with your ass was easy. Here are some highlights from my fabulous time with you: When your cashier is ringing up your precious produce, putting the codes in (from memory thank you very much), don't start trash talking her. I didn't hear you ask if I needed help because, well, um, I was busy ringing your shit up. When I look up because I heard something , don't look at me and say, " HELLO??" all sarcastic and shit. I will squish your tomatos, avocados and bread. When I ask if you have coupons, that's generally a sign that I am not a mind reader, can't see in your purse and can't predict the future (contrary to what you may think dear customer). As a refresher, here's our coversation: Loverly Cashier: Did you have any coupons today ma'am? (and that ma'am part may or may not have been choked out of my throat) Crotchety Broa...
2 comments
Read more

Um What?

Why does he feel the need to do this? He sleeps with his hand in his pull up. He pulls his penis out during the day to show me. Here I thought it went to Penis Playgroup. How did Peanut know, before even touching the icicle that it would be cool and warranted the face of pure happiness? Oh how she was distraught when it was taken away. I think she was really just pissed off because Monkey Boy took it and broke it into 12 pieces and that was the end of Fun With Sharp Frozen Things. *** I'm so irked at the whole T.O. thing in Dallas. I wish Jerry Jones would just stick his head further up his ass. *** When you stub your toe and the next day it looks like your 3yr old colored your foot with black, blue and purple markers, you probably broke it. *** It doesn't feel good when said 3yr old stomps on said foot during one of appx 14 meltdowns - this morning. *** Trying to rearrange a bedroom that 2 kids and an adult share while all those people are in there? Not such a good idea. *** ...
3 comments
Read more