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Best. Joke. Ever.

Or in the top ten at least. Thanks to Dre whose email I stole this from. Well, I didn't steal it since it was in an email TO me TO my account but since I don't know who wrote the joke it sorta IS stealing but anyway, slowly back away and put the Vicadin down.


A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I'm sorry. I was just thinking of my own funeral . . . I'm a gynecologist."

That's when the proctologist fainted.

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