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I Wasn't Aware

I did not know that somewhere along the way home yesterday we picked up a tyrannical redheaded communist leader.

I know that I joke around about her being a dictator but holy shit. Today, today people? If Hitler was ever going to be a four year old girl? I know what it would look like if he didn't get his way. It was ugly ya'll. U. G. L. Y. UGLY

I can't even remember what started the whole thing (probably that damn Dora! Jesus that little girl can cause some effin' drama) but I do know that the punishment was her movie that we rented (and she saw twice in 12 hours since renting) was going back to the store.

My god. If you were in the Midwest, lower Canadian area, oh hell, the continent of North America....I apologize for her screams. I didn't realize she could get that loud. Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick. Ugly people.

She screamed for thirty minutes while I tried to get ready for work. She screamed for thirty minutes after I left for work. My 21 month old niece was confused as she watched her cousin throw this colossal hissy* fit. My 6 yr old boy kept covering his ears saying he couldn't take anymore. The thought of caving in to just shut. her. the. hell. up. crossed my mind. I asked my beautiful MIL if I should give in and she said no. The girl would survive. I did not cave.

She's still alive.

It was close though. For a moment? Thought my daughter quotient was going to be 2 and not 1. Whew.


*spellcheck insists this should be hussy. no thanks, I'm sure that'll come with the teenage years. :::shiver:::

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