Another Reason Why I Hate Shopping

This post took me back to the days of working retail during the holidays. I remember when Tickle Me Elmo first came out. A security guard got stepped on when he opened the doors the morning after Turkey Day. By stepped on I mean he was practically trampled. The last Christmas that I was in LaCrosse, I was working for the company that distributes the music to the stores (edited stuff for K-Mart and Wal-Mart thank you). Anyway, I lived closest to my largest account so I went there for the day after to work. I didn't really work though, it was more watching people lose their freaking minds. Shoving and pushing around to get a stupid toy, can't recall what it was that year. I just stoof in the music department and was SO happy that I didn't work there anymore. (I used to work in that very department at that very store so I knew all the employees from before and I felt bad for them. Well, a little bit) I'm glad I don't have to deal with anymore.

I have to point at that at this moment, my daughter is attempting to assemble a washing maching in her mouth, copper piping and all. Right, she some PVC piping too! I'll be right there Peanut.

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DOODLEBOPS UNMASKED - ALL THREE

Please do not ask me to email photos out, I get entirely too many requests for them. These are the ones that I have at home, thanks to a couple of sources.

Customer Appreciation Day

Dear Crotchety Broad, While I love my job and think it's the easiest one in the world to have, I do not think dealing with your ass was easy. Here are some highlights from my fabulous time with you: When your cashier is ringing up your precious produce, putting the codes in (from memory thank you very much), don't start trash talking her. I didn't hear you ask if I needed help because, well, um, I was busy ringing your shit up. When I look up because I heard something , don't look at me and say, " HELLO??" all sarcastic and shit. I will squish your tomatos, avocados and bread. When I ask if you have coupons, that's generally a sign that I am not a mind reader, can't see in your purse and can't predict the future (contrary to what you may think dear customer). As a refresher, here's our coversation: Loverly Cashier: Did you have any coupons today ma'am? (and that ma'am part may or may not have been choked out of my throat) Crotchety Broa...

She Was Heartbroken

After reading about Kim and Reggie breaking up, the Monkey had a moment of silence to reflect on the love that is no longer there. And then she ate part of the page. Fiber! She needs fiber ya know! She wasn't as into the Saved By The Bell article like her favorite Auntie was (ahem) but she did kiss Zack Morris. No lie. Puckered right on up and layed one on him. He hasn't been the same since.

Wait...What?

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