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Showing posts from December, 2006

They Are Out To Get Me

or at least all of my money. A friend of mine saw my post and found this on eBay. I can't get it. I already asked the Captain and he said no. Actually he said we don't need it. Who is we? I know I could use it. Yes, I know I just got the purse but come on! I'm on a roll here revealing just how dorky and ridiculous I can be when I get into something. When the Osborne's had all their stuff out, I bought most of it. I've always liked Ozzy and Sharon just kills me. I have the first season on DVD. I still ask myself to this day why. I donated my entire collection to a benefit for a friend of a friend who needed help paying bills after her cancer came back. I hear they went for a good price. ANYway, I won't be getting the messenger bag any time soon. I think I'll be ok though because, in case you haven't heard, I GOT MY PURSE!!!

The Heavens Parted And The Lord Smiled Upon Me

Now I'm not that religious of a Broad. I do what I can praying-wise and I try not to say God dammit (pardon me Lord) but I need to take a moment to thank the Lord, JC, Jehovah, Alla, The Dali Lama, a Buddha or two and whoever else I can think of later. Oh and Greg Wiggle. I have to thank him.

I received this email today:


My name is Elizabeth and I totally stumbled onto your blog today by accident. I was doing a Google search for Greg Page from the Wiggles and ended up on your page. I couldn't stop myself from reading and feel like you are a kindred spirit!
The primary reason I wanted to email you was because I felt your pain with the elusive Dale Jr purse - I know they sell them on, but I'm not sure if they sell them in pink. It might be worth contacting them to find out!

She also added: We have an 18 month old daughter - which explains the search for Greg from the Wiggles.

This very nice woman was feeling my heartache and pain. I was so touched. The next email…

And I'm Crushed

My search is over. I don't need to look anymore. The apocolypse is coming. I've shed many a tear today.

My purse is not available and hasn't been for quite some time. The lovely lady at Wilson Leather told me that it could come back seeing as the coat was brought back. That gives me hope. I have the coat. I just need to keep an eye out for the elusive purse.


Happy Chrismahannukwanzaka

Do you ever feel you need a vacation from a vacation? We didn't go on a vacation per say. We went to my parents' place for the holidays. On the way there we had both dvd players going, an iPod mini blaring my husband's favorite* song loudly through the stereo and somewhere along Hwy 29, our sanity flew out the window. The boy couldn't put his headphones on by himself apparantly. The girl wanted Spongebob, wait no, Wiggles, wait no, Toy Story 2, wait no, Ant Bully, wait no......We brought ten movies. She helped picked them out and she named all of them. Did you know she's not even two? She scares me. A lot.
I had a number for Santa in my phone that when you called it, you would get a message from the man all the way up to Xmas. The threat of making that call to have Santa come get the presents was such a blessing. I just had to whip out the phone and both the kids would yell, "No! No! We stopped! No Mommy! Nooooooooooooooo!".
The kids made out like bandits…

Um, No Thanks, I Think I'll Pass

This makes me so anxious in a bad way just looking at the drawings and illustrations. I've been in the top of the Arch and I've seen the Tower up close and I've even been to the 30th ish floor of the Sears. This thing? No way. Not gonna happen. Look at how high up you are compared to those others! God, my legs get weak just thinking about walking out there. And the floor is glass! GLASS! Not enough torture being that high up but to see below? Oh I just shivered and got nauseous. You see how I said I saw the Eiffel Tower up close and went to the 30ish floor of the Sears Tower. Yeah that's how terrified I am of heights. I couldn't even get past the 40th floor elevator in the Sears Tower. An elevator. I did go to the top of the Hancock building once when Donna was visiting and she was flying out of O'Hare*. We thought we were in the Sears. Some guy pointed out to us at the top that "the huge building over there is the one you're looking for". Nice. M…

A Shootout In More Ways Than One

So the Captain finally got to see a shootout in person and boy was he happy. Even more so because they won. His sister and her husband were at the game too a couple sections over and the kids were happy to see them. I know they were happy to see them because they were tired of seeing us the whole night. We missed the first period due to traffic and parking nightmares. Peanut had no desire to sit for more than 12 seconds at a time. Monkey Boy decided he was going to freeze people as they were coming up the concrete steps to get more booze and food. Try explaining to an almost 4 year old that the Excel Center does not charge for stair usage (though with all the taxes and whatnot on the tickets, they could very well do that). Mike and Ike's were running amok, a $4 Coke was decorating the floor nicely and the poms were excellent floor sweeping utensils to rid out aisle of those unsightly peanuts. At least they amused everyone in our section. We got quite a few "Oh you guys are br…

We Are Family, I Got All My Sisters With Me (I Don't Have Any Sisters Though)

So my cousin Jason and a couple of his friends have a thing called The Des Moines Pub Crawl. That would be in Iowa of course where there's really not much else to do except drink (and I've spent summers there so no hate mail please [though it was a small town of 3,000 so maybe I don't know what I'm talking about (but I do)]). Wow, all those parentheticals messed me up. Anyway, they had their 4th Annual Santa Pub Crawl and had over 600 people show up. Looks like it was an awesome time. They collected Toys For Tots and canned food donations. It's not all about the beer and booze sometimes. People dress up in various costumes and there were plenty of originals out there. Check them out here.

I told ya'll about my brother in law's band, Soul Abruption. They have two shows coming up. One is at the Enigma in Shakopee, MN on Dec 30th. $5 at the door. The other one is the biggin'. Jan 5th @ 8pm they will be playing at The Red Sea Green Room in Minneapolis. This …

A Favor Por Favor

I need some help from my blogging buddies if'n you don't mind. Here's the deal:
One of my dearest friends, Georgia, has a son in 5th grade (excuse me while I take a moment to reflect on him as a newborn and him taking his first steps and crying because I feel old. Ok, moving on.) That's him up there with their kitties. His class is doing a project where they are collecting postcards from all over the United States. He knows that I know a lot of people and asked me to help him out. How can I say no to my favorite kid that I didn't give birth to? That's right, you just can't. If you would like to help out, please email me and let me know. All you would need to do is fill out this little form I have with a couple things about where you live and then, if you could, pick out an awesome postcard and send it to him at his school (I have that info as well). This project is something the whole class is working on but me being the person that I am, ha!, I want Zach to…

What I Want For Christmas Part 1

All I want for Christmas is ....

Someone to tell me that I'm irresponsible for belching like a freaking champ in front of my daughter and that behaviour is going to make a bad impression.Some stinky smelly gross icky guy to come through my line and give me the "ooh lala" look while the green fog of stench damn near knocks me over. Oh, and if he pulls his credit card out of his shoe? Bonus.For the person supposedly relieving me of my shift not even showing up or calling.The little pipsqueek at work to just irritate the shit out of me. Every single time I see him. Every. Single. Time. To work with the crazies who don't seem to give a shit about the work they need to do.Crabby bitchy ladies to come through my line. The more the merrier I say!Oh ya know what? I already got all of that. In a 4 day time span. It was an awesomely bad weekend. I live for those ya know.