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Showing posts from November, 2010

Oh! Why Hello December!

How YOU doin?

My Attention To Detail Does Not Exist

Whoopsies. A pony fell out the night before and I forgot to redo it. 
And this is how you fix that.  Truth be told though? She LOVED that it was wonky. Weird kid. I love her. She is a total mini me. Now I'm scared.  Hold me.


Some outtakes from an almost failed spur of the moment family photo shoot: (please, I beg of you all, ignore the extra chin I have. also? this was hours before we ate so I don't know where the eff the chin came from. let's blame the kids shall we? ok then) (again with the alsos - sheesh - I didn't edit these - like you couldn't tell bahahahahahahaha! ha!)
Blondie? Not a child I birthed. That's my niece, the Monkey.
Nom nom nom on the hand.
I birthed a pirate that lost his patch though. Awesome!
Someone tooted maybe? Who knows with this clan.
Usually this gesture means she just smacked someone but no, the redhead is not screaming her fool head off so things are alright in the world.  For now.
Monkey Photo Bomb!!
This would be a great shot if the baby didn't have a look of complete disdain going on. 
There were some good shots that came out of this debacle - I'll have them up soon

Stick A Fork In Me, I'm Done

Long day but so worth it. Hope ya'll had a great day.......
Please Auntie, that is quite enough with this camera thing. Sheesh
The indignity of her not that much than her older cousin kiss her. HORROR!
Nice photo bomb by her big sister!
Lather, rinse, repeat.

I Did Not Injure A Soul Today

Damned if I didn't want to though. I survived another Pre Turkey Day extravaganza and went home smiling. It was cold, very snowy and windy when I left. So glad that the roads were alright. I was wished the bell ringer a happy holiday tomorrow and he said, "You too".

Then he added, "You smell good"

Well, ok then.

Gobble gobble folks!

A Little Prayer

Dearest Lord, Baby Jesus, Jehovah, Allah, Buddah, Whomever:

  Please don't judge too harshly if someone were to impale another person for being stupid today. People truly have forgotten that please, thank you and excuse me are not horrible things to say. They should, in fact, be used in extreme abundance during this crazy time of year. Please do not frown upon the lowly customer service rep, who truly loves her job so so much and is thankful for said job. She may say she wants to punch someone in the throat but she doesn't really mean it. She may also say she wants to stab someone in the eye with a hot poker but she doesn't really mean it. She may say she would love nothing more than to throw a frozen turkey at someone's head but she doesn't really mean it.

Ok fine, just a titch but serrsly? Why haven't you smited them already?? They are killing me slowly and oh so painfully! ahem..........moving along........

  Please grant me the strength to not hurt someone …

My Daughter Is Channeling Hannibal

A little creepy no?

Slip Sliding Away

This is exactly what I don't like about winter. I can live with the cold (albeit with attitude but still, living) but the black ice? Yeah no thanks Mother Nature. Take it out on someone else. Thank you! And yes, I was stopped when I took this.

They Redeem Themselves Every Time

I hate going to Costco. No, I love going there. I hate the other shoppers there. It's truly the only other place besides an amusement park where people irritate the shit out of me as much as they do.

Where does it seem right to just barrel right on down the center of a main aisle, on a Saturday, taste test day, I didn't eat all morning because of all the tasty treats they'll have out day, where is it making sense to just stop? I mean dead stop and then abandon your look at socks. People!! They are socks. If you are that interested in a package of 28 socks, please, feel free to take your effing cart with you! Also if you see a person in the middle of turning down an aisle? Please don't be that asshole that hits their cart and then glares. Sometimes that person will pray very loudly for the Lord's strength so she doesn't kill someone because Costco clearly had a day where they gave memberships to all the bitches and assholes in the tri-county area. Th…

To Whom It May Concern

An Open Letter To Whomever,
  I'm not really sure who gave you the go ahead to be a complete douche to me. I'm fairly certain that is was not me. I've been wrong before but on this one? I would bet one of my kids on it. I know that I am a nice person. I'm a good person. I like just about every person I meet. If I don't? Well, I can't help it. I also know for a fact that I am the most irritating person in the world to some people. Not everyone gets me. Not everyone wants to get me. I get that.    What I don't get is that you seem to not care how your behavior effects other people. I'm in a good mood most days. Not in the mornings, take that bit of info and file it away in the IMPORTANT USELESS INFORMATION file. Trust me. I like to make people happy. I like to treat people nicely. I don't like confrontation and I don't like treating people like shit because hello? It makes me feel like shit.      I see that you, on the other hand, delight in talking …

This Mama Bear Is Preparing For Battle

A month or so ago, the boy was suspended from riding the van for being annoying (wtf?) and for throwing his sweatshirt at one of the two other kids on the van. Mainly for being annoying. Also because the van driver claims he almost ran off the road because of the boy. Doubtful and I tell you this because I've driven this child in a van during an all out fight with his sister and I'm here to say, I did not run the vehicle off the road. I pulled over when I could and let loose threats and promises and curses on Ouji boards and all that good stuff but when all was said and done, the van was still on concrete. SO.

I get this report (and two other reports that were never brought to my attention) and have a discussion with the director of special education regarding having a para on the van. He had one last year at his main stream school for the bus and I felt he would benefit from it this year. He was denied one the end of last year and that was an epic fail. Well, lo and behold my…

I Love Being A Sconnie

MADISON, Wis. — Authorities say a 67-year-old rural Wisconsin man enraged over Bristol Palin's Dancing with the Stars routine blasted his television with a shotgun, leading to an overnight standoff with a SWATteam. A Dane County Sheriff's detective says in court documents that Steven Cowan, of the town of Vermont, felt Palin was not a good dancer and was only on the show because of her famous mother.

What The H People?

Why am I so productive today? At work I think I may have scared Ash and J-Lo. I warned them that I was planning on being productive though so the shock wasn't as severe. I don't think I've ever felt that way at work AND then come home and be a cleaning machine cleaning through out the upstairs and yet? That's me.
I wasn't even this productive when I was pregnant with ANY of the children and nesting. Maybe I should pee on a stick? Nah, that's a waste of money. This baby making factory was shut down when the last occupant was evicted. She found a better, roomier deal.
So why am I organizing? The world may never know!

Migraines Make You Dum

So here I sit with my migraine and exhaustion. I can't sleep so my entertainment is relegated to watching Sunday late night television. For awhile there it was all CSI Miami, Without A Trace and Cold Case. I was in crime show heaven. Now it's Criminal Minds and N3mbers. I'm not really a fan of the latter though I do enjoy looking at  Rob Morrow. 

I watched the "Secrets and Lies" episode of Criminal Minds. It was eh. I called it on the mole but that's not the point. And people? I know you're wondering just what the hell IS the point? I don't know. All I know is that I got a bug in my craw and just had to look for title of the episode (my crappy converter box doesn't tell me the title, bastard box*). I get all excited and find the episode title and summary and realize something.

I have no idea what the hell I wanted to know about that episode or who was in it. Not a single blip in my brain while I was staring at the monitor. 

4am. That's when I'…

Most Anticipated T-Shirt

One of two shirts I won last week from @teamcoco on the Twitter.  10,000 tees in 10 days. 1,000 a day.  A new style every day.  I feel lucky to have just one.  Can't wait for the other one to get here.

A Rock Star's (Short) Life

Music, fans, autographs, party down party town, YOU are a rock star!!

aaaaaaaaaand down goes the rock star. What a short career.  Too many trashed hotel rooms we think.

The Love Is Still There

She was still tired after lunch and her nap but oh how she loves watching them. I am still so sad that I couldn't take the kids to MOA to see Big Time Rush. I hate that they were thisclose to us and there was nothing I could do. They still don't know I was going to take them. I don't think I'll ever let them know.

Late Start My Ass


My niece is here through Sunday and we are so stinking happy to have her here. I surprised the kids last night with her arrival. They never knew she was coming and they were thrilled to learn how long she'd be with us. The girls were up late last night because, duh!, BFFs are in the house! The boy had a late start at school today due to staff meetings. I was thinking "Sweet, the girls will be out until at least 830 and maybe the boy will sleep until 8"

Stupid stupid stupid.

Mommy Basics 101: The child(ren) will always rise before the sun on non school days. Same child(ren) will argue with you on school mornings until you stab yourself in the nose with a pickle fork because they don't want to get up.

I know this gets worse as they get older. Please, let me be naive right now. Thank you (said in my best sing songy Mary Poppins voice)

The boy was up before 7am I'm sure. I could hear his "heh heh heh" tic in full force and that usually takes awhile for h…

Can We Fix It? Yes We Can!

Mr. Mario is here to fix the problems you have......

Mr. Mario's technique is..............different no?

I Think I'll Hand Write These As Well, For That Special Warm Fuzzy Touch

Dear Jerry Jones,

   Thank you. It took you long enough.

Long Suffering Fan since 1978
(I wanted to be a cheerleader and the devotion to the boys stuck through the years. Don't judge please!)

Dear Brad Childress,

     I don't know what to say. You should resign? You should change tactics? You should do something different? I just don't know. Something needs to happen. People have their underwear all in a bunch over such ridiculous things. Focus on the game I say. And can we just agree to go for it when we are 4th down and less than 3 yards out?

Long Suffering Wife of Fan
(and a fan herself so long as we aren't playing the 'Boys)

Dear Jeff Fisher,

     Dear lord why? Also? Good luck.

Loves to you,

Fashion Week Day

The fashion bug hit the house today when the girls woke up. And yes, they took full advantage of that extra hour. Bah. After our pancake and eggs breakfast, I painted their nails and then they did my hair. I love letting them do my hair. I know it's going to look so crazy but it feels so good. Like I took a ten minute nap. Awesome, party of one? Awesome? The fashion struts on the catwalk didn't go as "high fashiony" as the girls were hoping for. The silliness all happened after the one walk. Enjoy......
Alice in a messy Wonderland. 
The Doctor with a baaaaad bedside manner.

Alice and her spot o' tea
Alice's closeup
Why yes, this is exactly how doctor's pose for ID shots.  Didn't ya know that?
Buzz buzz buzz
Loverly Ladybug 

Scaredy Cats

Sad faces
Um roaring attacks? Couldn't tell ya.
My fave from the shoot.