Skip to main content

You Didn't Ask But Here's Some Advice

BOO!

When you know you're going to be working a 5 hour shift at the store, standing and walking the whole damn time, don't wear knee high, 3 inch heel, 1 size too small boots. I don't care how cute they look on you, how hot the husband gets seeing them on you. Don't. Do. It. The pain? It's indescribable. If my foot was run over by the pallet jack tonight, I wouldn't have even noticed. I did come perilously close to breaking my ankle a couple times when my foot decided to go visit the other one without telling me. Damn limbs and their own minds. I thought that was just a man problem.

When wearing a long, black, itchy wig it's a good idea to have a clip of some sort or a pony holder. I was looking like Cher* for the first hour or so. I even stuck the tongue out like Jack. I was told I should sing whilst doing that but I don't believe in torturing innocent people. That and I would hear whining from the Clean Team because they would need to clean up the bleeding ears mess. I hear enough whining from my kids, no thanks.

When you finally get the chance to wear your Renaissance style dress, a dress that you purchased 5 years ago and couldn't wear until now because you've been pregnant for almost 2 of those years, a grocery store is not really the ideal place to work it girl. I stepped on it so many times tonight and damn near killed myself. I did get a lot of compliments though and it made it all worth while.

Finally, when you are living with non holiday participating in laws, take the outfit to work. Change there. This way you don't have to hide in the bedroom waiting for them to leave on their annual "We don't want to be home in case trick or treaters stop by" outing. My FIL saw my outfit and said, "Wow, you're wearing a dress to work?" All I could do was say, "Yup". I felt bad cause I don't want to make them uncomfortable. It is their house after all. At least I left the witch hat in the trunk. That would have been awkward.

So after all this trauma to my footsies, maybe I'll win the $30 (or $20 or $10) gift card at work for wearing a costume. I hear not too many day players wore one. Party poopers, yay for me!

*Might I add that I LOVE this movie and she's a big reason why. Not sure how that happened but eh, oh well. Useless info, carry on.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

This Has To Be Said

I haven't blogged in 8 months. We bought a house, still unpacking, school started. You know, life. I felt the need, the urgent need to blog about the Adrian Peterson situation today. I am full of all sorts of feelings and had to write about it. I would love to hear your thoughts on this whole thing. No really, I would. I don't feel I was a douchebag in my writing so all I ask is you not be a douchebag in your response. Thanks.

My thoughts on the Adrian Peterson situation (but first, some backstory):
I was spanked as a child. I'm pretty sure most of us that grew up in the 80s were.Until the summer between 5th and 6th grade I lived in Charelston, SC and from 6th to 11th grade, North Chicaco, IL. I have seen every form of discipline doled out on a child. I've seen spankings, beatings, hairbrushes smacked into heads, spoons hitting the tops of heads, whips, belts and even switches. I've seen it all.Most of you know that my son is named after a little boy who died from c…

One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other

When was the first time that you realized that your home was not like other people’s homes? 

My house has always been different from other houses. I don't think I could narrow it down to a particular time. I recall not having friends stay over. Ever. I always stayed at all my friends' houses and called their moms "Mom".

Not a lot of my friends were only children so to them, I was the odd duck. Believe me, I *was* the odd duck. Just for a myriad of other reasons.

Having a family of my own, I really see the differences in houses. We are more relaxed with some things that would not fly in other houses. It gets loud in our house. Extremely loud. If I stopped them from being loud all the time, I wouldn't get a single thing done. I tend to jump in right away when the kids are arguing because it can, and will, quickly snowball into WWIII and someone (or both) will be crying. We let our son play the Wii, computer or DS for far longer than other parents or even the "…

DOODLEBOPS UNMASKED - ALL THREE

Please do not ask me to email photos out, I get entirely too many requests for them. These are the ones that I have at home, thanks to a couple of sources.