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I Didn't Mean To, Really

I wasn't exactly running late for work tonight but I was cutting it close. It's pitch black and cold. Ick. A shadow appeared on the road and I thought it was probably a squirrel. It'll dart back across the road when I get closer. No, the squirrels? They're smart. They hibernate. Or hide. I don't know but I haven't seen them on the road (dead or alive) in a couple weeks. It was a raccoon. Quite possibly the largest raccoon I've ever seen. I hit it.

I seriously was not aiming for it, I even swerved a little bit. I never touched the brakes though and that will probably have Karma on my ass for awhile. Really though, it should have waddled back to the other side. I screamed. It was loud. Then I laughed and almost peed myself. That would've been fun trying to explain that one to my boss.

I hit a deer once on the way to my Gramma's house. Actually, I maintain that the deer was very interested in the color of my dad's car and came a running to get a closer look. My friend that was following me (she had a padiddle and didn't want to get a ticket) stayed with the deer while I went back to the gas station to have them call the deer pick up people or whoever gets called when someone kills Bambi. By the time I got back, the deer was gone. She got up and walked away. Her jaw was demolished but her legs were just fine. I felt so much guilt because I just knew that she couldn't eat and was going to starve. It happened right next to a rural country cemetery. To say I was freaked out would be redundant.

I didn't tell my father for two days. I was terrified I would get in trouble even though it was clearly not my fault at all. Hello? When I did finally tell him, it was over the phone about an hour away from him. I had to take precautions. He was ok about it. He asked if I was ok and why did I want to wreck the car? Oh I don't know dad, sounded like a great plan at the time. Especially since you didn't know I would be going out of town with your car. Yes, I was a thinker. The car was fine, save for the passenger door. My cousin had to climb in ala the Dukes but the garage guys popped it out. They also gave us some touch up paint for the couple chips that were missing. They put it in a nail polish size container so I did what any bored 22 year old would do. I walked around with pretty nails. Yes, that color over there. My dad knew I crazy then.

I hope to never hit a deer full on. It seemed that every car my uncle ever owned was finally taken out of commission by a deer. That poor Bonnie of his. That car was demolished. He finally got his truck though. Maybe he aimed for the buck. Hmmm.

Have you hit a deer? Did you pee yourself? You can tell me. It'll be just between us. Right here. On the blog. I only have 4 readers ya know.


Les Becker said…
No, but I hit a tree once, over 25 years ago and no one - NO.ONE. in my family will allow me to drive their cars. Ever.
Mandy said…
i have never hit anything... other than like the curb every damn day. haha.

and had i hit something on the way to work... i would have been freakin out and totally called in sick. cindy would understand right...?

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