My children? The ones I could live with? The ones that I would voluntarily take out in public? The ones that would hug and love on us as if tomorrow was never going to come? You haven't seen them? Hmph. Neither have we.
Instead, what we have here is a
failure to communicate 6 1/2 yr old boy who thinks that he can say things like, "Helloooo?", "You better answer me Mommy right now!" and, my all time favorite, "Look at my hands (on his hips) and look at my face! Do I look like I'm joking?" No, you don't look like you're joking. Here, taste this soap on your tongue. Does it taste like I'm joking? Didn't think so.
Add to that lovely ball of over energized testosterone, one fired up diva/princess/dictator. And yes, as a matter a fact, a cute 4 yr old redhead can be all three. At the same time usually. It's a rather fascinating phenomenon. If I weren't so embarrassed at how she acts, I would show you but really, some things are to be cherished by mamas alone. Thanks for understanding. Also, I can't tell you how much money I have set aside for hearing aides but I know I'll need them soon. These screeches and meltdowns leave me with ringing in the ears. I would rather go see Glam Slam Metal Jam* again at the Marcus before hearing her throwdown again.
So please people, if you see my children?
Far and fast
*I don't mean that in a bad way either, I loved that show. The boys were fun to see all grown up but oy, they are still loud. (Good God, how freakin' old am I?) I would gladly go again though. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?