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I'm Laying It All Out Here

I've had some pretty craptastic teeth for some time now. I'm extremely self conscious about them. When I was a teenager, I started to get an overbite and when I was told I couldn't get braces because they cost too much? I was pissed. I'm pretty sure I was the only teenager that was mad she couldn't have a mouth full of metal. It's not like I was lacking in things to get picked on for: chicken legs, super skinny (I had great metabolism!!), glasses, bad acne. Not good. And yet I was begging for a retainer and braces. Bah!

I had a toothache a couple weeks ago and it had me in tears. I knew it was a bad tooth and that food was getting caught in it. I had to man up and go in. How'd it go you ask? Let's just say I was crying and all I had was x-rays and a talking to. He was very nice though, didn't make me feel like shit for not taking care of my teeth the way I should have in my twenties. I look back on the photos of me from back then and they didn't look too bad. Now though I find myself covering my mouth all the time when I laugh. And people? I laugh a lot. That's a lot of covering going on, I may as well be wearing a ski mask. Wouldn't look to out of place in the summer right?  So to say I was in need of work would be an understatement. He referred me to a specialist and off I went. 

She took a look at the x-rays, did an exam and had a talk with me too. She explained the options and really made me feel at ease even though she was going to be spending an obscene amount of time digging around in my mouth. Blech. There are two phases planned (so far): Phase One is cleaning. A super cleaning of the teeth, down in the gums, oh sounds like a grand time doesn't it? Phase Two is filling the cavities (let's not even start on how many of those bad boys the Mt. Dew helped make) and pulling a couple teeth. I was crying (again with the crying! sheesh!) as she was telling me this and really, I can't begin to tell you how mortified I was that I allowed my teeth to get this way. It's horrible. If I had waited a couple more years to go in, I would have dentures by the time I'm 40. No thanks. 

At my second appt with the specialist, we got started on the cleaning. There was talk of nitrous oxide before but that apparently was forgotten. Until I had a huge panic attack. The nurse got the mask on me and it took awhile for the gas to get through the snot build up from crying. Have I mentioned that I'm a wuss at the dentist? 

Side note: I was planning to use my iPod during this torture cleaning session but my lovely five year old daughter borrowed my earbuds (the only ones that don't hurt my ears) and of course, lost them.  I thought they may have a set at the office but no, it was not my lucky day. I was kind of looking forward to listening to Neil Diamond and have him calm me down. Nope, I got to listen to the screeching of cleaning tools up against my teeth. Ish.

She finished with the top teeth about an hour later. An hour you say? Let's just say there were several breaks. Ya know, for the crier. She decided that for the next visit, I was to take Halcion before coming in. I'm supposed to have someone drive me there and home. Hi Mandyland! You get to hang out with a stoned broad! Woohoo! Should be fun no? She was going to pull a root tip that was sticking out and the abscessed tooth but I was freaking out a tad too much for her. Shocking right? On Tuesday I have to get an impression done of two teeth that are coming out so I can have my very own fake ones. Sweet! 

I've got some pain medication that really isn't doing the trick. I don't like that. Not one bit. I can handle back pain, leg pain, even wicked cramps but pain between the top of my head and my chin? No no. I can't take that. 

I'm rambling so hey maybe the pain meds are working. They're doing something for sure.  Anyway so yeah, I'm getting a buttload of stuff done to my teeth and hopefully they'll look better soon. Also? I haven't had a cigarette since Wed afternoon. I know it's only been three and a half days but hey, it's something. I was going to quit the Mt Dew at the same time because I don't want to get my chompers all fixed then eff them up with the smoking and the Dew. Then I realized if I quit both of those things at the same time? There's a high probability of someone dying by my hands. It would not be pretty and I don't think I would do well in jail. 


Kelly said…
I have to say I enjoyed reading this. I'm student dental hygienist in college, next year when I graduate I will be a registered dental hygienist :) I actually plan to work but continue on in school until I can become the dentist. I just wanted to comment on a few things you said in this blog.

I myself do not have perfect teeth, I have an overbite and crowded teeth. Before I started this program I felt ashame too, I didn't show my teeth when I smiled in any pictures. The dentist in our dental clinic at school is also a teacher. He has became my mentor and his teeth are not perfect! I was astonished! He said to me one day that no his teeth are not perfect he has crowded crooked teeth but they are not causing problems they are healthy and he takes care of them and that's whats most important. I don't know if that means much to you but to me it was awesome!

As I hygienist, yes mountain dew is the worst thing you can drink, and smoking is bad for your teeth, mouth, and overall health. I may be a bit hypocritical but I will be honest I can not and won't nag anyone about these things but I will inform them of the harm. I am a smoker and I drink mountain dew. If I quit either right now (as you said) I may not make it through this program without wigging out on someone (laughs) I do plan to quit a prescription for chantix and its good that you haven't smoked! That's really good! As far as the mountain dew goes, I understand...its always the good stuff that is bad. What I do (laughs) I brush, floss, and use mouth wash more than your regularly told to because I do constantly drink mt dew. Try brushing 3-4 times, floss 3 times, and rinse 3-4 daily too. Also, if you can, chewing gum with the "ADA SEAL" on the package (certain Orbit gum has it) after eating and drinking.

Thought I might just add that! :)

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