Wait...What?

Photo courtesy of the 18mo old who won't be happy unless she can play with a real phone, not a fake one, because, HELLO? she knows the difference. The girl's parent/teacher conference was on Thursday and she got a glowing report. She's intuitive, caring, kind, helpful, smart and makes really hard repetitive patterns. She's a smart one, this kid. She's going to get this reading thing in no time. I don't think we'll need to worry about her academically. For that I say, Whew!!

I go into the best store on the face of the planet with a $50 limit and walked out with $3 to spare and these costumes: I also left with an Elmo cotton lined bucket, some stretchy slimy spiders, spiderweb stockings, 2 Airbender shirts for the boy (which he deemed "sweet!!!!!") and a super cute Tinkerbell bag where the handle is a bracelet. Tres cool according to the diva daughter.

...when they die, they don't have the courtesy of going outside to die  therefore they stink up my house. The dead animal smelling up the joint this past spring was found. I'll be sure to tell Simon and Theadore that it was a quick death though I'm sure they'll see right through my thinly veiled lies. Perhaps they'll chew off my nose in the middle of the night. Hopefully they'll wait until I'm congested so as to get extra fiber. Does snot have fiber?* I don't know why no one else in this house can smell the dead animal because the odor is all up in my nasal cavity and really, ya'll, it's not gardenias and vanilla. The chipmunk was found (well, I imagine what was left of him was found - ish)  in the heating duct going to the main living room. This one is hitting the upstairs. Where the baby sleeps. Where I sleep. Where the 14 year old 5 year old sleeps when she feels the compulsive need to steal 2/3 of a bed and 87% of my blankets. Heat rises ...

Do you ever have those days where you go into work and you're in a genuinely great mood only to have ruined by complete and udder idiots? Yeah. Me too. I would have sworn that tonight was a full moon or at the very least, I screwed up my days of the week and it was actually Monday. Sadly? Neither of those events occurred. Damn it. On a happier note though, we found out yesterday that a regular customer that has been MIA for a few weeks is ok. She called yesterday and in talking with her, we found out she developed Bell's Palsey. Oy, I was so worried about her. She came in tonight and bless her heart, she's so damn cute. I would guess (and I'm horrible at age guessing) that she's in her mid/late 60's (don't shoot me!!!). She was wearing a pair of purple sunglasses that look like the kind my kids wear. She said she wanted to get people looking at those and not the side of her face that isn't moving. I told her she looked beautiful no matter what and gu...

So I'm reading this , because I love everything she writes ( here too ) and these videos? They are making me giggle. Giggle to the point that I am waking the baby up. So not good. Then I get to the comments and this video was linked. People? It has taken me at least fifteen minutes to type this up without typos. I need a tissue. Several please. If I don't stop soon, I could very well......oh let's not go there.

Hello November (say it the Jerry Seinfeld voice - DO IT!)..........Well well well, what have we here? Another November is upon us. What does this one bring? I'll tell you what this one brings: A lot of grief. Of the football variety. People, you have no idea how it saddened my husband to learn that the Vikings put Randy Moss on waivers today. Serrrsly . It boggles his mind. He never thought the Vikings would be on this road to what? Misery? A trainwreck? It's worse than when they lost last year in the playoffs. Dare I say, it's worse than when the Twinkies lost to those em effing stinkin' Yankees. My husband loves all things sports related. Ya'll have heard of Deer Widows right? Well, I have it worse than that. That? One weekend. Two if they bow hunt. Me? I've got that when it's football, baseball, hockey and college hockey and football season. AND don't even get me started on the godforsaken Gopher football program. My husband says the Eden Prair...

I knew I wouldn't be able to go too far with the posting every day *but* I think I did pretty damn well for a long time. You know whose fault this is? His: I don't know that there are words that can accurately describe Eric. Well, none that can go here at least. his: touch football indeed and his too:  cause he cracks me up, hookah! and her: who wouldn't want Tara at their side to say what they can't? oh hell, them too: I watched all three seasons in the last week.  I've got to catch up on Dexter and Bones. Plus the husband rocked it out for my birthday in May and got me Freaks and Geeks on DVD.  Love that show and can't wait to watch it again!