Wait...What?

The Captain and I had a date last night. A double date with my sister in law and her husband. Oh. My. God. I had waaaaay too much fun. I haven't laughed that hard or that much in so long. It's amazing what visuals of certain people nekkid can do to a person mentally. It was fab. We went to see an amazing movie . I didn't think I was going to like it. Thought it would be a cheap ripoff or lesser quality storyline wise than other movies. I was pleasantly surprised. The Captain was not surprised that the teenage boys behind us would not shut. the. hell. up. There's a scene near the beginning of the movie that is, how shall I say, really not one that boys who should be so lucky to ever have a woman want to do those things to him should be watching. They giggled every time a boob showed up. Hot chick ? Nipplegate ? Did they need a moment to figure out why they had "those" feelings? Did they need a cleanup? I just didn't want to sit in front of them. I don...

Funniest thing ever (thanks to SATGS for hipping us to it) I was bored and saw this on Kemp's page so yeah, here we go: 1)Go to Wikipedia: and I'm done with that 2) In the search box, type your birth month and day but not the year. This one seems easy enough 3) List five events that happened on your birthday: First: 1703 - Tsar Peter the Great founds the city of Saint Petersburg. Second: 1895 - Oscar Wilde is sent to prison for sodomy. (Um wow, that's a hell of a useless fact that will now forever be burned into my brain matter. Thanks) Third: 1937 - In California, the Golden Gate Bridge opens to pedestrian traffic, creating a vital link between San Francisco and Marin County. Fourth: 1939 - DC Comics publishes its second superhero in Detective Comics #27; he is Batman, one of the most topical comic book superheroes of all time (my husband would file for divorce if I didn't include this one. It's Batman for God's sake) Five: 1995 - In Culpeper, Virginia,...

Monkey Boy has taken to chasing his sister around, making her scream, when she won't give him something she has that he desperately wants. (I think that's one of the longest sentences I have ever typed in my life next to the one that I'm typing right now of course). Peanut took a facedive off the small set of steps this morning, courtesy of her brother. She almost went down the big set of steps because she was not, under any circumstances, going to give up the purple building block. It's hers and you can't have it unless you pry it out of her cold dead hands which, coincidentally, was the direction my son was trying to go in. I called him over, scolded him and made him hug her. Normally she shrieks and recoils so as not to get the cooties. This time she hugged him back and said I love you. Then he came and gave me a hug as well and out of nowhere, completely unprompted, said, "You are the best mommy in the world mommy". I didn't care that he was on a c...

Look Daddy, it's my golden ticket for the factory .

I beg of you kindly, Please remove this from my head. It's been there for entirely too long and quite honestly, I don't know how in the h-e-double hockey sticks it got there. Thanks in advance! With All My Love, Lil Ol' Me

"There are all different kinds of balls. What kind do you like to play with?" Overheard on a kid's show and repeated. But of course.

That's right, I'm a strawlicker. Don't be hatin' on me you strawlicker haters. Georgia kicked some serious ass on my hair this weekend. They learnt her well at school. Have a lookie see: I don't think I have ever left for the bars as late as we did Saturday night. 11-1130ish we finally rolled down the driveway. Of course we went to Yesterdaze, then we popped over to the Vibe and went back to Yesterdaze. We got some absolutely deelish subs at bartime. There was one poor fella working on a Sat night all by his lonesome. At bartime. In a college town. At bartime. We got there when it was empty then about 15 people decided to stroll in after us. They had to wait while he made our sammiches. We felt like rockstars. Linds went to wash her hands with bleach a few times (I'll explain in another post) and had Georgia watch her drink. I walked over to get my soda and G puts her hands arms body around Linds' drink. When she let her guard down, I licked the straw. Di...

Dear "British" Woman Lady Hag, I don't think you're British at all. You never have an accent in the Pharmacy. You're nice to them over there. I think if you are British that the Queen ( this one , not this one ) ordered you brought to the guillotine and you jumped the pond to terrorize people here. You come to my front end and harass my cashiers and customers. You started in with the gentleman behind you one day because he was buying Gummy Bears . GUMMY BEARS! Really! Want to know how you sounded? (Use your best English accent here, even if it's a crappy one) Hag Who Looks Around Late 30's: (looks at customer behind her then at the items he's about to purchase) Nice Fella Who Looks Around 30something: (looks at her and says hi cause that's what we Minnesotans do, we're nice like that) Hag: How old are you? Don't you think you're too old to be buying Gummy Bears? Fella: Excuse me? Hag: Really, you Americans and your poor diets. No won...

I'm so happy I finally got this done. I took the photos myself so they look crooked on my leg but really, they aren't!!! However, the Ankh is very faded. Next up is my zodiac sign on my neck with the kids' signs on either side. I always get mine done at Mind Altering in LaCrosse, WI. I highly recommend them. Sparkx did this one. Dave and Cody did my other three. If you're in the area some Sat and want to get something done, that's the walk in day. Have at it. I promise on all things holy, the "British" customer story is coming tonight. I swear. So much funny shit happened this weekend that I need to rest and think about it all in order to blog it. It'll be fun for me I'm sure. Nap time!

So I have serious issues with Mother Nature when she decides to dump 18 inches of snow on my lawn just hours before I'm to leave on my much anticipated trip to LaCrosse. Damn the woman and her PMS type tendancies. The plan, before Murphy came along and conspired with Ms. Nature, was to leave Friday morning and spend 2 1/2 glorious days with Georgia and Zach, see some friends and family and more importantly, get my new tats. Yeah, snow kind of kills that idea. Especially when it takes more than 30 minutes just to brush the snow off the car, nevermind the digging out, the uphill stop sign and the car not wanting to do anything but dance to this . I've been living in the midwest for 20 of my almost 34 years. (I must pause and cringe that I just put in writing that I'll be 34 this year. Makes it all the more real for me. Gah!) I spent 7 years off the lakefront in Chicago, brutal winters in the 80's. Winter trips to no man's land in Iowa. Yikes. 12 in Wisonsin. Did you k...

Totally stolen from my friend Georgia